While it’s good to be back home with my teenage daughters, I am going through withdrawals.  I miss my sweetheart terribly.  We had nearly two whole weeks together, more than we’d ever managed before, and we still couldn’t get enough of each other.

The situation is a bit complicated.  I’m not sure about how much detail to go into here, because she is a very private person.  I, on the other hand, blab just about anything to anyone — something I’m learning not to do.  Still, having been raised in California, it’s my nature to over-share.

The plan is to have her move down here sometime this summer, but that’s no longer a sure thing.  It depends a lot on factors out of our control.

I do know one thing.  I love her with all my heart and soul.  I love her without measure.  I love her forever and for always.  Without her, I will become a monk.  Seriously, a monk.  This is the last relationship I will ever be in.  It’s her or nothing.

I can go on and on and on about how wonderful she is, but that would just embarrass her — as I’m sure this is already embarrassing her.  So I will stop.

So, I wrote some on my novel while at airports and on airplanes over the last few weeks.  Anyone else working on their novel, still?

Hello everyone!  I’m back in Texas.  The kids have the car and are out for their Saturday night hijinks, and so I’m going to walk across the street and try the newly opened sushi restaurant.  Tonight I’ll be writing some beer reviews and tomorrow some coffee reviews.

Life would be perfect if I had my sweetheart here with me. 

Hello from Moline

Hey there!  Just sneaking some time out from work to shout out a hello to everyone.

Having fun in Moline Illinois, though it’s very wet and soggy here at the moment.

Right outside the door here is the Mississippi River, though, once again I forgot to bring a camera!

I exist because I say I do.

Why, I keep wondering, did it take me so long to figure this out?  If I had figured this out as a teenager, I would be so much further along now.  But, no, I needed other people to say I exist, or I didn’t.  I depended upon other’s perceptions of me.  Without them I disappeared.

Perhaps it took me this long because there were many lessons in this life I needed to learn?  I don’t know.

This is how it works now:  I say I am a writer.  Therefor I am one.  And I am.  That’s how I make my living.

I say I am a coffee reviewer.  Therefor I am one.  Now I get free coffee because companies send it to me to review.  Why?  Simply because I said so.  No one else validated me.

I also say I am a beer reviewer.  Now I get free beer.  (The maintenance guys in my apartment complex see this and view me as a genuine hero.)

That’s how it works.

I am because I say I am.

Life is so much better this way.

Weekend Update

Just got back from my first week in Moline, Illinois, and am scrambling to get ready for my next week.

My kids did fine, in fact thrived, while I was gone.  They even picked me up at the airport without trouble.  No missed school, no dents on the car (I looked!), no burned down apartment … it’s all good.  They even still had some of the money left that I’d given them.  Of course this is because I told them that anything they didn’t spend on groceries, they could have at the end of the week as personal money.

The questionable result is I came home to find they bought a little bunny rabbit.  And even though they have it out on the balcony, the fan sucking air in from the balcony window gave the entire apartment the essence of bunny cage, and that set my allergies reeling.

Neither LadySavina nor myself got fired … we pulled it off!  We were able to be professional around each other at work, and resist temptation even when alone.  All that tension built up to the point that, after work, we literally flung ourselves into each other’s arms.  If our married life is only 1/10th as passionate as this, I’m going to be living in a cloud of happiness.  Seriously, though, I don’t see this passion ever cooling, even a bit.  Relax a little, maybe, but never cooling.

We have it bad for each other, really bad.

The trip started out on a rather odd note.  I rode to the airport with my boss (OUR boss) and … his plane ticket didn’t work.  He had to stay behind.

As usual, I have good luck on Friday the 13th, but bad luck on Saturday the 14th.  Friday I got two paychecks, Saturday my eldest daughter’s computer got nailed by a virus.  Why is that bad luck for me?  I’m the computer repairman who has to deal with it.

This morning I’m taking the girls to EdgeFest – they’re going to rock out all day long.  Me, I’m still going to be fighting that computer virus.

Question to my Xanga friends – what do you most like to read about here?

  • Struggles with writing and publishing?
  • Silly posts of random wanderings?
  • TMI posts of romantic adventures?
  • Rants about things that piss me off?
  • Poems and flash fiction?
  • Or … lists of questions?

  I get to see my love tomorrow!

I got TWO paychecks today.  Woohoo!  Which is a good thing, because that’s paying for my kid’s airline tickets to see their mother this summer.

Today some major grocery shopping, tomorrow some writing, Sunday my kids go to EdgeFest while I hang out with Twiddle38 and drink Hairy Eyeball Ale, and MONDAY I FLY UP TO SPEND A WEEK WITH MY LOVE (…and, um, work, and pretend we aren’t an “item” while anyone is looking).

We’re going to be so busted.

Goodbye Kilgore Trout

We lost Kurt Vonnegut.  He was our modern day Mark Twain.  He passed away yesterday at 84 of complications from a head injury he received a few weeks ago.

From CNN:  Vonnegut once said that of all the ways to die, he’d prefer to go
out in an airplane crash on the peak of Mount Kilimanjaro. He often
joked about the difficulties of old age.

“When Hemingway killed
himself he put a period at the end of his life; old age is more like a
semicolon,” Vonnegut told The Associated Press in 2005.

“My
father, like Hemingway, was a gun nut and was very unhappy late in
life. But he was proud of not committing suicide. And I’ll do the same,
so as not to set a bad example for my children.”

Bittersweet is this life.

My ex-brother-in-law passed away last night.  My kid’s uncle Mickey passed away in the hospital after spending the day on life support.  My younger daughter’s godfather … or as we frequently referred to him as, her fairy godmother.  He/she was quite the character.  A funny, sometimes prickly drag queen.

There’s no way, unfortunately, that we can make it out to California for the funeral.  Even if my younger daughter did inherit all his worldly possessions.

And while life is indeed bittersweet, one must concentrate on life, and on the sweet instead of the bitter.  I took my kids out for therapeutic milkshakes last night and we took turns sharing fun memories of him.  It really seemed to help.  We’re all just worried about my ex, who’s taking the loss of her brother hard.

He was the first of 8 brothers and sisters to go.

Meanwhile life goes on, and my house is full of giggling kids.  And I get to see my love in 5-1/2 more days.

We’ve been sending love poems via email to each other constantly these last two days.