I’ve scheduled a session with a psychologist to help me sort through these jumbled emotions. I haven’t seen one since 2004, and I’m actually looking forward to it … especially since my insurance covers it. Booya insuance!
Something that’s troubling me right now is hard to express, and I don’t want to bore everyone with the details, but this is my attempt to sum it up in a nutshell: I’ve had to let go of things so much in my life that I’ve become an expert at it. I can shut off and walk away from just about anything. It’s made me not want to attach to things so that I don’t have to let go of it later. Does that make sense? And now I find I’m sick and tired of letting things go, and I want to hold something tight and keep it as mine and have it close to my heart, and not let go of it, ever ever.
And yet all signs point to me having to let it go.
I wonder what the psychologist will tell me.